On how and what to say to others with herpes: The Ultimate Herpes Protocol
I am a holistic healer- a herbalist and homeopath. My family have been healers for many generations in my native country of Trinidad and Tobago and as far back as Africa. I had little to no interest in treating herpes as a healer until I got herpes myself. Wanting to change a negative to a positive, I decided to make the holistic treatment of herpes the cornerstone of my practice. The bible says “the stone that the builder refused, I will make my cornerstone. Bob Marley and the wailers sing about it too.
It didn’t take me long once I decided to become a holistic viral specialist to realize that I was confronted with a daunting challenge. Most professionals including all the herbalists and homeopaths I know rely heavily on referrals to build their client-base. Here I was now working with a client-base that I was never going to get a lot of referrals from. My patients with herpes don’t go around telling the world that I helped them with their outbreaks. Some of my patients have yet to tell their significant others that they have herpes, many have not told their closest friends and their family. I am not a company. I don’t have an advertising budget. The only way for me to reach out to others with herpes and encourage them to come for me for treatment was to speak out in public about my herpes work and about herpes in general. This forced me to be far more out of the closet than would have been my personal choice.
I seem to always create challenging situations for myself. Speaking to others with herpes is not a task for the faint of heart. Some people like to shoot the messenger- I have the bullet-wounds to prove it. But I can say that speaking to others with herpes has been and continues to be one of the most gratifying experiences in my life. I feel a deep bond with many of the people with herpes who interact with me. I felt this kind of bond when I played team sports. I’ve felt this kind of bond all my life with other black people. There’s something about “us against the world” that can make people tight with other. I love my herpes friends. I love my herpes patients- even the ones who misbehave. I am not grateful for getting herpes, but I don’t regret it either. Nevertheless, the truth hurts, and I have some bitter truth to tell others with herpes:
Having a lover who also has herpes isn’t a free ticket for unprotected sex. Even if you both have the same strain Even if one gave it to the other. Having unprotected sex with each other can and often will make one or both partner’s cases of herpes worse. It’s called re-inoculation and it’s a message many with herpes don’t want to hear.
If you have herpes or cold sores you are potentially contagious everyday and there is no sure way to tell if you are shedding virus. So do consider using a condom/dental dam combined with an anti-viral gel when having sex and do be careful about sharing wet towels or wash cloths with others.
No two people get herpes the same way so you are going to have your own individual experience with the virus and will have to find your own way of dealing with it on all the different levels you will have to deal with it.
A cure for herpes in our lifetime is unlikely and there are no quick-fix solutions for managing herpes. Herpes cannot be managed with a topical agent alone- whether it be creams, lotions, or essential oils. Managing herpes takes changing your diet, managing stress and other triggers, and may also require either taking herbal medicine or drug therapy.
You may not get fewer outbreaks as you get older. While this is often the case, since no two people get herpes the same way, other diseases, menopause, self-abuse, re-inoculation by unprotected sex and other factors can change the pattern of frequency and severity of outbreaks at any point during your life-long journey with herpes.
Cold-sores are just as contagious if not more contagious than genital herpes and you can infect others when there are no signs of sores present.
Having herpes does make you more vulnerable to other sexually transmitted infections including HIV, cervical dysplasia and genital warts.
Daily use of l-lysine is an ineffective strategy for treating herpes and can do more harm than good. There are more effective natural remedies such as garlic for treating herpes without side-effects.
On talking to those who don’t have herpes:
The reality check for me is that the mainstream and alternative media do not want talk about herpes. They would prefer to keep us in a ghetto. There is a lot of misinformation floating around and people without herpes have few places to turn to hear the facts about herpes. They don’t hear the facts in their churches, young people are not being educated enough about herpes in school. Most parents aren’t teaching their children about herpes, older siblings are not passing information down to the younger ones.
It’s really up to us who have herpes to try harder to dialogue with those who don’t. HIV won’t be the last word in human population control from the world of viruses. If we don’t learn how to better protect the population from getting herpes and other sexually transmitted infections we are going to be in a lot of trouble. Herpes is a gateway disease it provided easy access through your mucus membranes for any sexually transmitted virus.
It is my unshakeable conviction that those of us in the herpes community need to be more vocal in the media and to also reach out to those around us. Each one teach one. Each one reach one.